by: Patrick Ross
The Legend of Zelda is an anti-Semitic allegory
According to this theory, in The Legend of Zelda, you play as Link, Aryan posterboy and slayer of Jews. I mean, take one look at this face and tell me it doesn’t scream “master race”:
All the classic signs are there. Blonde hair: Check. Blue eyes: Check. Elven ears and fairy garb: err…check?
In fact, Link finds out that he is a member of the Hylians, the most important and revered race in the history of Hyrule, more important than the stupid Gorons, the effeminate Zora, and the godless Gerudo. Even the princess he so zealously saves is a prototype blonde-haired, blue-eyed angel. And who is always behind the kidnappings of this picture-perfect bastion of purity and beauty?
My dear GOD, look at that schnoz! If this isn’t some vilified Jewish outcast, I don’t know what is. Ganondorf is a power-hungry havenot from the desert of Gerudo hell-bent on stealing and destroying the Holiest of Holy religions, the Triforce. Three paragons of virtue…sounds an awful lot like Christianity to me! To make matters worse, the Triforce is made out of solid gold, an obvious inference to the Jewish stereotype of money hoarding. And when Ganondorf doesn’t get his way, he transforms into a sniveling, repugnant, all-powerful pig. Can this game be any more blatantly anti-Semitic?
Of course it can, thanks to the vile, sick minds at Nintendo. Even areas not pertinent to the storyline are laden in Nazi imagery and propaganda. Just take a look at the first-ever Zelda game, setting an unholy precedence for the whole damned series:
That’s the third dungeon of the game, shaped not-so-inconspicuously as a Nazi Swatstika. Never mind the fact that the level is literally named “The Manji”, which is the name of the ancient Buddhist character standing for universal harmony and balance of opposites (Decidedly different from the whole “Nazi vision” thing.) That’s not relevant. What is relevant is, erm…NAZIS! Everywhere!
This isn’t the only game designed to convert your children into capitalist-hating, fascist scum. Why, just take a look at…
by: Patrick Ross
THE LEGEND OF ZELDA RAP [MUSIC VIDEO]